Why Do People Cheat?

Most of us know what the heartache feels like of a partner cheating on us. Fifteen to eighteen percent of married couples have cheated on their spouse.  Men are more likely to cheat as they have more testosterone which is responsible for our sexual desire. If you have ever wondered why people cheat then here are some reasons why.

Drifting Apart

The longer a couple has been together the easier it is to feel like you are drifting part. This can lead to craving attention and wanting to feel special. So if someone else shows them that attention then they are more likely to act upon it. After all it is human nature to feel wanted, needed and appreciated.

Taken For Granted

If one person has to do everything in the house like sort the bills, cook, clean, look after the kids while their other half doesn’t pull their weight then they can feel taken for granted. An affair can be tempting to escape reality and feel appreciated. Or equally if one partner feels criticised and like nothing they ever do is right then they might turn to an affair to feel appreciated, valued and like they are important to someone.


Some people whose partners have hurt or cheated on them might cheat on purpose to hurt them and get revenge.

Falling Out Of Love

No one can predict at the start of a relationship that they will fall out of love with their partner but it does happen. You no longer get those butterfly’s, you don’t enjoy sex like you used to and you don’t feel head over heels for them anymore. This can lead us to act upon our desires with other people who do make us feel more alive before the current relationship has ended.

Fear Of Commitment

Some people get scared of responsibility, especially when things get serious. Examples of extra responsibility that can cause someone to cheat are: getting engaged, moving in together and having a baby. These things can make some people feel trapped and like they need to escape. Cheating is their way of escaping reality.

Feeling Unloved

Sometimes life can become just a routine. Going to work, looking after the house, kids etc and showing affections and emotions can be forgotten about. This can make someone feel unloved which means they may look for the attention and affection else where. Everyone needs hugs, cuddles and physical affection every so often. Otherwise it can make you feel quite lonely.

Wanting Different Things In The Bedroom

People can have very different needs and desires in the bedroom. This means that some people might cheat in order to do stuff with other people that their partners are not willing to do.


Some people don’t have much confidence in themselves. They require reassurance from many people and this reassurance and flattery can be like a drug. So if someone shows them a lot of attention and makes them feel good about themselves then they are more likely to cheat. Also some people might not feel good enough for there partner so they may cheat in order to avoid the rejection that they fear.

Scared To End It

Sometimes people cheat because they are scared to end the relationship. By cheating this usually means that their partner will break up with them instead.


Sometimes people can be in a stable happy relationship but their libidos do not match. This can lead to frustration, feeling undesirable and a general lack of intimacy which is an important part of a relationship as it helps us feel close to each other. If there is a lack of desire for sex from your partner this might make you cheat for many reasons such as getting your fix, feeling intimately close to someone, feeling desired and feeling wanted by another human being.

Long Distance Relationships

Being in a long distance relationship can be tough for a whole host of reasons. Because of the distance and not being able to see them very often it means you can often feel lonely and disconnected from your partner, especially if there is a lack of communication. It is hard for a long distance partner to offer emotional support when needed because they are often not around. This often leaves the individual feeling that they have to face things alone and feel like they kind of don’t have a partner. This means that they might look for that support, time and affection closer to home from someone who is there for them when needed.

Not Making Enough Time

If your partner doesn’t make enough time for you then you can feel like you are living separate lives even when you live in the same house. This can make you feel lonely and it can also make you learn not to rely on or need your partner. It can kind of make you feel single or that you may as well be single if you do not spend time together. This might make you look for other people to spend your time with and seek comfort from if you partner does not make time for you. This can lead to forming new friendships and eventually a relationship and an affair.

Sex Addiction

Some people have sexually addictive behaviours. It is an addiction just like any other such as drugs and alcohol. This means they feel like they have to have sex or they won’t feel right. They can also use sex to relieve negative feelings and satisfy desires. Because this is an addictive behaviour people often find this addiction hard to control. So if there is not much of a sex life in the relationship then this can lead to the individual getting there fix elsewhere.

Their Partner Doesn’t Enjoy Spending Time With them.

When one partners idea of relaxing or having fun never includes their partner and they do all of these activities with other people then this can be quite hurtful. A partner should be able to relax and have fun with there significant other as well. When this happens it can leave the person feeling quite deflated and like they must be boring or not enough for them. If the person is constantly left home alone while their partner is out having fun with other people then this might make them crave attention from someone who makes them feel like they are fun company. Someone who makes them feel amazing and that genuinely enjoys their company. No one wants to feel like they are boring. So this behaviour could lead to friendship that turns into cheating or an affair.

Miss Ruby Hearts

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